It’s Okay Not to Play

For some parents with PMD, bonding can happen in other ways. 

The reality is that sometimes, and maybe most times when you’re suffering with Postpartum Mood Disorder, you’re not going to feel like playing with your baby. That’s okay. Bonding is a process and it takes time. Play isn’t the only way to get there. What you can do at this moment is enough. At this point, try to focus on skin-to-skin contact and touch because it produces the hormone oxytocin—one of the four “feel good” hormones.

Here are some ideas for small things when you feel like you can. 

• When you feel able, hold your baby. Stroke them.  

• Change diapers. Make eye contact. Narrate what you’re doing so baby can see and hear you up close.  

• Count baby’s fingers and toes. Touch is an important part of the bonding process. 

• Feed your child, holding them close with skin-to-skin contact. 

• Look at your child while they are lying in their crib or other safe place. You will have a positive impact just because the baby can see your face and know that you are responding to them.  

• Sing your favourite song if you feel like it. Babies don’t know the words; they’re connecting to your voice.  

When you don’t feel like you can interact with your baby, ask your partner to help. Bonding will happen. It’s going to take time. Be kind to yourself. Please reach out to us at BridgeWay if you need some support.